3 Months
Cassandra died 3 months ago today.
- No, time does not heal all wounds.
- Yes, you can physically feel your heart ache.
- No, there isn't anything I wouldn't do for one more minute with her.
posted by Todd Akers @ 3:10 PM
1 comments
1 Comments:
Wow 3 months. It already feels like a lifetime.
The pain is unbelievable. I don't think people who haven't lost their child could understand this but Todd is right. There is a physical pain associated with this loss. Heartache is what it is. An all encompassing ache that even makes it hard to breathe. I was reading a Parental Grief book called When the Bough Breaks and in it a woman mentions that she finally knew what heartache was - it was like fireworks going off in my head. This is what it is.. My heart literally aches for my baby girl.
I think later Todd will realize that the pain changes. It don't get easier it just changes. He has never lost anyone really really close to him before. I lost my mom to suicide when I was 18. Until Cassie died it was the worst thing that had ever happened to me. But it got easier each year... eventually I didn't dwell on her birthday and her death day. They finally just came and went with only a passing pause. Right now it is different. With Cassie's passing so recent we dwell on these things. Each 17th (her birthday) and each 6th (the day she died) loom over us with such power and pain. Days leading up to them fill us with dread. She never got to be 20 months old, she has been dead for 3 months.
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